February the 15th, “Only bad dreams”.

“Clear your mind and get a hold on yourself and, as when awakened from sleep and realizing it was only a bad dream upsetting you, wake up and see that what’s there is just like those dreams.”

—MARCUS AURELIUS, MEDITATIONS, 6.31

The worse dream I had was struggling to wake ip and can’t wake the body. Sleep paralysis is the name given to a feeling of being not able to move or scream.

Don’t feel bad after the dream cos it’s just a dream. It has passed and non of it matters anymore.

I don’t have that now but it’s just a dream. Sometimes during difficult times of your life when you are awake, do you feel trap in a bad environment and feel you are not able to change anything?

My take is change your perception first by looking within. I”woke” up one day after a conversation with my colleague who said that we can’t change anything except ourselves.

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

– Steve Jobs

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Kind True Necessary February 14th, “Think before you act”

Happy Valentine’s Day to you.

“For to be wise is only one thing—to fix our attention on our intelligence, which guides all things everywhere.”

—HERACLITUS, QUOTED IN DIOGENES LAERTIUS, LIVES OF THE EMINENT PHILOSOPHERS, 9.1

Speech

My daughter’s once told me her teacher reminded them to ask three questions before speaking:

Before you speak, let your words pass through three gates:

At the first gate, ask yourself “Is is true?”

At the second gate ask, “Is it necessary?”

At the third gate ask, “Is it kind?”

why over so many centuries later human can’t overcome acting like a fool? I wonder.

Revenge

Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves. – Confucius. 

Got it? Think of intention before acting.

February the 13rd: “Pleasure can become punishment”.

“Whenever you get an impression of some pleasure, as with any impression, guard yourself from being carried away by it, let it await your action, give yourself a pause. After that, bring to mind both times, first when you have enjoyed the pleasure and later when you will regret it and hate yourself. Then compare to those the joy and satisfaction you’d feel for abstaining altogether. However, if a seemingly appropriate time arises to act on it, don’t be overcome by its comfort, pleasantness, and allure—but against all of this, how much better the consciousness of conquering it.” —EPICTETUS, ENCHIRIDION, 34

Pleasure becomes regrets and hate

Abstaining becomes joy and satisfaction

That is self control

My Friend has intention to reduce smoking but fell into the addiction

How about me, my indulgence is coffee which I took daily. I don’t find it necessary to reduce that.

But the big thing is eating oily and unhealthy food May caused future illness later.

February 12nd. “Protect your peace of mind”

“Keep constant guard over your perceptions, for it is no small thing you are protecting, but your respect, trustworthiness and steadiness, peace of mind, freedom from pain and fear, in a word your freedom. For what would you sell these things?”

—EPICTETUS, DISCOURSES, 4.3.6b–8

Our perception (cause) shape our actions (effect) like anxiety, stress, anger.

To protect respect, trustworthiness and steadiness Ryan asked

Is this really the life I want? Are those things trivial for you to get worked up or tempted or etc.

This morning I couldn’t fall asleep again after 4 am and I realised my mind was practicing presentations and things I wanted to do at work. It’s quite annoying not to find peace and it disrupt my beauty sleep.

“A gentleman finds peace of mind in virtue and he covets it” (Confucius cited in Chew 2000, p. 8).

There is a common theme in great thinkers of the east and west.

Both cited virtue as the cure to attain peace. Cultivate the right virtues and you will free yourself from the suffering of endless chatters in your brain.

How did I try to find peace? I tried meditation and listening to smooth relaxing hypnosis to relax myself. The key is to be aware you have fallen into the chatter zone. One you realise that, bring your mind to a restful state.

Digital Body Language

In today’s world of globalisation and in my line of work, I have to connect to teams virtually.

Emails are commonly an engine of communication. It’s great wonder people start talking about digital body languages.

I have colleagues telling me why did so and so write their whole name in the email? And why include this and that person in the cc.

Chew on this…

Attaining the talent triangle skills, with style

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